Spring Promo Sketch

Hi all!  Well , it's time to stop procrastinating and get busy with my spring promotional piece.  I thought I'd go ahead and show you the sketches. This will be finished in felt . I shared this sketch with my crit  group (the Pb&j's) and thought I'd post the comments they made along with the revised sketch. In our group, we  use the "sandwich method" . Start with a positive, your suggestions, end with a positive. We've found that works really well for us.  And more importantly, if you're receiving a critique, remember it's only an opinion...if it doesn't feel right to you, stick to your heart. 

Suggestions:

1) vary the size of the kids more, break up the "line".

2) make the girl winning the prize the focal point.

3) can't make out the hat flying off the dog, maybe try it flying off the girl.

4) give that poor little boy near the cat a trunk!  (these weren't the exact words, but after I noticed it, I sure did feel sorry for the little guy)

I need to have it finished by February and at that point I'll have postcards made. I kept that in mind when I came up with the dimensions for this piece. I'll post the final piece when I'm done.

 Thanks Snowbear!

Comments

[Snowbear]

Hi Roz,
May I offer you a sandwich too?

Great idea for a promo piece--I love all the activity.

The boy with the fish should be off balance since the leash is wrapped around his legs--just bend him at the knee and put one leg up--makes more sense with the fish bowl all askew.
Tilt the girl's hat up so that the flow of action is not following her-the wind would blow it up--you could even show the inside if you want.
And the last suggestion--which is only to try and make the drawing even stronger would be to give the winner even more focus by a stronger pose--she seems lost in all the chaos around her. Since this is a sketch I don't know what your plans on for color--but you could make her "POP" that way or have her raise her hand with the ribbon in triumph---Or even put the ribbon in the bird's beak.
Hope you don't mind my crashing the picnic.
The bottom layer of the sandwich is this is a good illustration with lots of kids and action which should attract some good prospects. Nicely done!

[roz]

Are you kidding?! You can crash my picnic any time you like. Thanks for the wonderful suggestions, snowbear! Back to the drawing board. =o))

[janee]

Hey! The kneeling boy looks much more comfy now! :-)

[jennybee]

I can't wait to see this done up in felt! So cute!

[patrice]

Love the sketch, Roz! Also enjoyed seeing how your crit group helps with feedback. Very cool! A good start becomes great ! Looking forward to seeing the felt finish!